coldbeansoup’s post reminded me to look at my own free will astrology. Capricorn:

Writing in the magazine sub-TERRAIN, John More makes the following declaration: “Captains of industry, great generals, artists of genius, even politicians, are often just people who have discovered that alcohol can enable them to make economic, tactical, creative, or political decisions whose implications would paralyze a sober individual.” Your assignment, Capricorn, is to find an alcohol-free way to make such a decision. It’s time for you to summon visionary courage from your soul, not from a bottle, as you catalyze complex blessings that will ripple through your future for a long time. 

It’s funny, I was thinking on the way home how exactly what I need in my life is some visionary courage & I was lamenting this because I tend to see myself as quite a fabulous administrator of things, though I hope not to the bureaucratic extreme, but not so much as the visionary. I’m very good at taking care of details that help other people’s visions become/remain reality, but not so good with coming up with the vision myself. And when I do, they’re very… administrative… visions. Lately, the (latest) administrata has felt somewhat restricting. How does an administrator become a visionary?

I don’t know.

 

I started looking at house financing things, USAA vs a friend who is a broker (but only for family/friends now).  Brain go melty.  I need to talk to broker friend, but iirc, she flat out said last time USAA would match/beat what she could provide… but with these complicated big money things, it’s nice to have a person you know on the other side.  OTOH, USAA has *never* let us down, *ever*.  I mean, except calling like three times in the course of me being in labor with M1 (admittedly, it was a long labor!) — but they didn’t know that & they wanted to make sure that the accident my car had the day before I went into labor (without me, or anyone, in it, fortunately) was getting estimated & the like.  I do need to figure out the whole who-we’re-going-to-use thing this weekend because…

Next week we talk to our real estate agent about going back on the market.  We were on the market nearly 6 months last time.  You know what?  I’m really dreading going through this all again.  Not even so much the having to always have the house immaculate (we are not an immaculate peoples by nature here), although that does suck, but the tromping of people through the house and the continual unspoken assessment by them that it’s not what they’re looking for which makes me feel like there’s something wrong with our house.  And it’s disruptive & stressful for teh kittehs.  And us.  And there’s a bazillion other things I dread about the whole process too.

Meh.